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Jan 20, 2010

I’m Not A Rookie Mom, But Fevers Still Worry Me

January 20, 2010 By

Give me a daughter facing the challenges of autism, and I rise to the challenge. Or give me a daughter with a speech delay, and I fearlessly jump in to start early intervention with complete confidence she’ll triumph.

But give me a kid with a hacking cough and a fever of 103.5 who looks this miserable:

…and I’m a puddle of worry.

I’m often impressed with how Cordy and Mira remain so healthy. Sure, they get colds about as often as any other kid, but they are most often minor colds and rarely slow them down. Fevers are always minor – just a little warm, no need for medication. And we’ve had plenty of stomach bugs, but other than the unpleasantness of cleaning up blow-out diapers, they weren’t too bad.

And then Mira’s cough began on Sunday. By yesterday it was a constant, fierce cough that forced her to catch her breath after a coughing fit, along with a fever. She spent last night coughing and crying in her sleep, and I was unable to do anything to make it easier for her.

This morning she slept in, something she rarely does. And then she refused breakfast, something she never does. She didn’t want to play or watch TV – she only wanted to rest her flushed little face against me. Her temp was 103.5.

So I took her to the pediatrician, where I was given few answers: It’s probably not strep. It’s most likely viral, either a throat infection or the flu. No antibiotics for now. Nothing to do at this point but give her ibuprofen round-the-clock on schedule, keep her hydrated, and wait it out.

Wait it out. Sounds so simple, and yet…

Today she didn’t fight her nap for once, and she didn’t pick fights with her sister. She spent a lot of time on me instead of playing with her trains. She’s not herself, and I don’t like that.

Many parents have kids that run fevers like this all the time, and are probably so used to it they would laugh at my hand-wringing and worry. I’ve advised several parents on how much ibuprofen to give and signs/symptoms to watch for, however it’s always different when it’s your kid. This is mostly new to me, and feeling the nape of my smallest child’s neck on fire, even with ibuprofen and Tylenol in her, leaves me feeling helpless.

I’m hoping she’ll wake up tomorrow a little less warm, a little more energetic, and a little closer to putting this behind us. If not, I’ll be right here to provide ibuprofen, refill juice cups, and provide a comfortable lap to cuddle on. I’m thankful to have a job with sick time so I can be home with her when she needs me the most. Because it’s not my nursing skills that are being used here –  it’s being her mommy that magically helps her feel better.

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Also, I’m proud to announce I’m one of several talented writer for the new Ohio Moms Blog! (Part of the amazing SV Moms Group.) Stop by for a visit, and be sure to check out my first post there, where I am once again performing amazing feats of hand-wringing.

Filed Under: being a mom, love, Mira Tagged With:


Jan 14, 2010

Delurk and Help Haiti, Too

January 14, 2010 By

It seems to sneak up on me every year, but today is yet again the Official Delurker Day, the once-a-year plea for those of you who quietly read to write one little comment of support. (Or even if you do comment, please say hi also!)

It’s hard to believe I’ve been blogging now since 2005, and it’s even harder to know that I don’t get to do it as often as I used to. There was a time when I really cared about my stats and would religiously follow them each day, looking to see which posts got the most attention and trying to guide my writing towards more like those. Since starting my crazy job working the night shift, I’ve had way less time, and significantly less brain power, to devote to blogging. As a side effect, I’ve also lost my obsession with my stats. I know less people come by here now, and that’s OK. (Even if Mom 101 named me one of her Top 50 Mommybloggers that didn’t make the Babble top 50 mommybloggers list and are probably more fun anyway. Also? There’s some awesome blog reading in that list.)

So while I may not write as often now, I still come back because I want to interact. I love it when others read and enjoy what I write, and I love finding new people who share my interests. I feel bad that I don’t get to interact with my readers as much as I used to.

(And let’s not talk about the backlog in my Bloglines. If I comment now on a post you wrote two months ago, take it as a compliment that I really wanted to comment, even though it took me that long to read it.)

However, just because I’m not writing or interacting as often doesn’t mean I have less appreciation for my readers. I’d probably still be here writing even if I was just talking to myself, but thank you for coming back and taking an interest in my life. I truly do appreciate it, and I value the friendships that have developed from this little corner of the internet. Thank you all for keeping me sane.

(And for putting up with the extraordinary number of parentheses in this post. Apparently half of my thoughts are really asides or after-thoughts.)

So if you have a moment in your busy schedules today (or whenever you read this), drop a quick comment in and say hi.

And one more thing – if you’re even more moved to do so, delurk in the world community and make a difference to the people of Haiti after that devastating earthquake. Donate to the Red Cross – even $1 helps – or if you can’t, use your blog or Twitter or Facebook to get the word out to others, asking them to help. The people of Haiti have already undergone a tremendous amount of poverty and hardship before the earthquake, and they need our assistance more than ever now.

Edited to add: I’ve now added a button on my sidebar that lets you donate to the Red Cross for the Haiti relief effort. All donations go directly to the Red Cross.

Filed Under: shameless promotion Tagged With:


Jan 14, 2010

A New Year, A New Blog, A New Weight

January 14, 2010 By

Last year I found myself depressed by my weight, wanting to do something about it before going to BlogHer in July. Thankfully, I wasn’t alone, and several others banded together to support each other in our efforts to shape up and feel good about ourselves in 2009. I did it by my Hot by BlogHer challenge, and by joining up with the Shredheads.

Overall, I lost 20 pounds last year before BlogHer – not a bad effort for five months! I felt so much better about myself, too. But after BlogHer, I came home to a new full-time job, with new full-time exhaustion, and most of my exercise habits slipped away as sleeping became my top priority. I kept some of my eating habits, but I’ll admit even those suffered when your job doesn’t give you a set lunch break and you have to grab something on the go most of the time.

So of course, when the new year started, I knew I wanted to get back on track again. I don’t have as much leisure time to exercise when I want anymore, but I know I’ve got more weight to lose and I want to get motivated again. Hence, this new blog: Losing My Hind. I could have gone back to Hot by BlogHer (and may bring that up as a challenge again), but I wanted a blog that didn’t have a time limit, so I could use it year round.

Thankfully, I’m still not alone in my goals. The Shredheads are going strong, and Loser Moms just gave me an ideal jump start: they’re having a Biggest Loser challenge, where $$$ is on the line for the winners. Sure, a smaller dress size is a great motivator, but a little cash to buy new dresses is a powerful motivator as well!

Yesterday I began the Loser Moms challenge, which involved my first weigh-in. I hadn’t stepped on the scale for awhile, and was worried I’d crept back over 200 – something I vowed to never do again. The scale gave me my starting number:

193.6. Woo-hoo! I already feel like I’ve won, considering my lowest weight last year was 192 pounds. Sure, I haven’t lost anything since BlogHer, but it means I really haven’t gained, either. I’m hoping to lose at least another 20 pounds this year before BlogHer, and hopefully at least 10 for the Loser Moms challenge.

This time, working a full schedule (on nights, no less: 7pm-7am is murder on your metabolism and circadian rhythms) will make it difficult to do a structured, formal weight-loss program. Weight Watchers was great, and I still believe it works well, but I need even less to think about at the moment. Instead, I’ll focus on smaller portions, less processed foods, and lots of whole grains, vegetables and water. Exercise will be sporadic on my days off, although some nights at work could probably count for exercise.

I’m ready – let’s do this!

Filed Under: weigh-in Tagged With:


Jan 12, 2010

2010: Now This Is More Like It

January 12, 2010 By

I wanted 2010 to be the year of everything awesome. And so far, it’s not too bad. In fact, today kind of feels as far from 2009 as it could possibly be.

After a year and a half of unemployment (aside from a four-month contract job), Aaron started a new job today. It’s only a three-month contract for now, but the plan is to hire him on as a full employee at the end of the contract. Basically, the contract is his trial period. His first day went well: the job is creative and challenging and his coworkers are friendly and welcoming. I’m hoping it works out and he’ll be happy with his work.

As a result of his new job, we had to juggle our childcare situation. Aaron will be working traditional office hours, and while I work nights, we still need someone to cover on the days when I’ve worked and need to sleep. Cordy’s in school full-time, but Mira had only been in preschool two half-days a week.

So today Mira went back to her school, but into a new classroom. She’s attending three full days a week now, giving me a chance to sleep more, and giving Mira what she wants – the chance to spend more time at school. (The other days will be covered by a friend and family.) At two-and-a-half, Cordy hated being outside of the house, and would have fought going to preschool each day. But Mira, our little socialite, loves school and would complain when we picked her up each day.

I worried that a full day schedule might be too much, even for Mira, but when I picked her up at 5:15pm, she responded to seeing me with, “I don’t wanna go home.” Apparently she had a fantastic day, and is thrilled to go back again tomorrow. All is well with the changes in her schedule.

OK, nothing much has changed for Cordy. Other than she will now be sent home with homework starting this week. Homework? In pre-K? School has changed a lot since I was a kid.

As for myself, I’ve got a few days off right now and I’m finding myself happy to be more involved in directly caring for my girls again. Since starting work, I’ve been on the periphery at home, with Aaron taking on the bulk of childcare while I have waffled back and forth between being a day walker and a child of the night. Adjusting my schedule back and forth is terribly hard, leaving me feeling like a shell of myself at home with my family.

But with Aaron working now, I have to step up and force myself to be more involved again – and I like it. I like being the one preparing lunch, doing the school drop-off routine, reading with Cordy, playing games with both girls, etc. I missed doing all of that. Well, maybe not all of it, but a lot of it. We’ll see how things go once I’m back to work later this week. I hope I’ll be able to find some inner strength to be everything to everyone without cracking.

Even our house got a little update today. Thanks to an awesome Black Friday deal, we got a new microwave. Our current one is on a little stand taking up way too much room, and I wanted something above-the-range so I could replace that little stand with a pantry. Today, part one of that plan was accomplished:

Before:

Um, yeah, ignore the mess around the range.

After:

Shiny! Pretty!

So yeah, let’s keep 2010 moving right along on this positive wave, OK?

Filed Under: Aaron, being a mom, daily life, family time, Mira, the J-O-B Tagged With:


Jan 6, 2010

Guinea Pig, Part Two: For Reals This Time!

January 6, 2010 By

Just before Christmas, Cordy finished the first ten week segment of the clinical research trial I took a gamble on earlier in the fall. The study offered us the chance at parent training in behavior modification and/or a medication that can help attention-deficit symptoms in children with autism. In our case, we were randomly selected for the medication-only group, not knowing if we had the actual medication or a placebo.

At the end of ten weeks, the results were less than encouraging. Cordy’s behavior was practically unchanged. Still unfocused. Still unstoppable energy. Still struggling to finish a task without becoming distracted. But there were a few small changes that showed a glimmer of hope. In that ten week period, she stopped hitting herself, and although she switched to verbally abusing herself instead, it was still an improvement. We also noticed a slight decrease in the amount of “flapping” she does, too.

So did we have the medication? If we had the medication, I felt it was a big, fat failure. I mean, I wasn’t expecting miracles in a pill. I knew it could help calm Cordy and help her focus so she could accomplish more, but I knew it wouldn’t turn her into a typical kid. But I was expecting a little more than a couple of stray behavior changes.

At our last meeting, the doctors in the study looked through all of the data and determined Cordy was a non-responder. As a result, the seal was broken to find out the truth: it was the placebo.

I was a little disappointed that I forced Cordy to go to weekly visits, endure two blood draws (not fun for anyone involved) and take a lot of pills for no benefit. But honestly, it wasn’t that bad. Cordy quickly loved going to “the office” as she called it. She loved “her work” and the student assistants who work there became her willing slaves. All of the staff have been incredibly kind to her. While at each meeting, she was given an unlimited supply of organic fruit snacks, animal crackers, juice, toys, markers and adoring fans. Hell, I kinda wish I got all that stuff instead of a big stack of papers to fill out each week.

But it doesn’t end there. That was just part one of the study. Knowing that she was on the placebo, we are now entering the open-label phase of the study, allowing her to start all over with the actual medication this time. (Those who were on the medication in phase one are allowed to continue on the medication for phase-two.) The dose will be increased ever-so-slowly and we’ll watch her closely for any improvements as well as any side-effects.

I’m back to being excited at the possibilities and yet again a little nervous about medicating my daughter. Only this time I know for certain it’s the real thing. We’ll see what happens.

To end on a cute note: I was told by Cordy’s teachers today that all of the boys in her class are in love with her. Not just love her – are actively IN LOVE with her. They’ve been back from winter break for just two days now, and apparently the boys pester Cordy all day with, “Do you still like me, Cordy?” She’s the queen of the classroom, with five little boys willing to do anything for her. I love that about her – despite her social difficulties, she has an aura that attracts people to her, even without trying or encouraging them in any way. It’s an amazing gift to have.

Filed Under: Autism, Cordy, love