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Apr 20, 2007

Growing ‘Em Big

April 20, 2007 By

As we get down to the last few weeks, we are slowly making progress in getting ready for the new baby. This weekend, I’ve managed to snag one day on Aaron’s schedule to put him to use – finding old baby gear in the garage, moving junk out of the spare bedroom to start making a nursery, etc. Clothing has been purchased, yet still needs to be washed. Cordy is refusing to give up her claim to her crib at night, but at least she sleeps in her toddler bed on those rare days she naps.

Best of all, Cordy is starting to grasp the basics about a new baby coming. We’ve tried for months to introduce the idea to her, but she just didn’t get it. However, just yesterday, after telling her half a million times that her baby sister is growing in mommy’s belly, I asked her, “Where is your baby sister?”

And she pointed to my belly.

It’s a start.

My doctor’s appointment was today, and it turns out that the chiropractor visits, the homeopathic medicine, and the last two weeks spent with my ass on the couch and my head on the floor were apparently not a waste of time. The ultrasound showed that she has turned head down!

Of course, it also showed a baby with a gigantic head who refuses to hold still and moves far more than a baby that size should. Which means that just because she’s head down at the moment doesn’t mean she will stay that way. I was instructed that when I go into labor, the first thing I should ask for at the hospital is a position check, since this child is proving that she doesn’t like to stay still.

During the ultrasound, as the doctor was examining her abdomen, we got to witness a full barrel roll. I think we were both completely amazed by this show of determination, and even more so when the doctor used her measurements to estimate the size of this girl.

She’s currently estimated at 6 pounds, 15 ounces. (yes, ultrasounds can be off in weight) Two weeks ago, she was estimated at 19.8 inches long, and I’m sure she’s broken the 20 inch mark by now. Her head is measuring at full term already.

I’ve still got 4 weeks to go. Total weight gain for me as of today: 2 pounds. She’s taking everything I have.

Apparently Aaron and I are breeding a new race of Amazons.

Filed Under: Amazons, pregnancy


Apr 17, 2007

Day (Not) Off

April 17, 2007 By

I’d like to thank those of you who added your thoughts to my last post. It was a lonely, hormone-fueled weekend, and it felt comforting to know I wasn’t alone in wanting to escape from my “domestic bliss” now and then.

I took a vacation day from work today. While a day off is very needed, relaxing wasn’t on the agenda. My new babysitter started today, and I stayed home to go through the routine with her. She’s a friend of ours who was looking for extra work and money for when she and her boyfriend move to Boston this summer. In the past, she has watched the children of other friends, so I feel very comfortable leaving Cordy with her.

M is one of those people that kids naturally like. She’s full of child-like energy that kids are magnetically attracted to. She’s young and hasn’t been worn down by having a child around her 24/7, begging for juice and cookies, waking at 6am, and testing every rule every minute. In other words, she’s a perfect companion for a hyperactive toddler two days a week.

And while Cordy is normally shy and cool towards anyone she doesn’t know well, she happily played with M and had no issue with me leaving for an hour to go to a chiropractic appointment. When I returned, they were in the kitchen eating lunch, M having just taught Cordy the “peanut butter jelly” song. Cordy liked her enough to even spare her the afternoon poopy diaper on her first day.

I think she learned the routine pretty well today. I didn’t realize how strict a mommy I am until I listened to myself spouting off all the rules. Some are for Cordy’s protection – no food with cinnamon, since she’s allergic – but others were less critical, such as no going upstairs unless it’s naptime, no shoes on the couch, and crayons must be put away when done, or no TV for the rest of the day. But I’m still soft on some things: sandwiches must be cut into triangles, because it’s Cordy’s favorite shape, she’s allowed to play with daddy’s poker chips if she keeps them at the table, and snacks can be eaten in the living room while watching TV. It was tough to remember all of the rules, and I’m sure M will forget some of them, which is OK, because they’ll form their own way of doing things.

So we have a good babysitting arrangement for the moment. However, M will be moving away in June or July, so we still must continue to look for daycare for Cordy, but the search isn’t so urgent now. Tomorrow I’ll go back to work, and M will have her first day on her own with Cordy. I hope it will go as smoothly as it did today, and Cordy won’t prove to be birth control for yet another young friend of ours.

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Apr 15, 2007

Alone in the House

April 15, 2007 By

It’s Saturday night, Cordy is upstairs asleep, and I’m sitting downstairs alone. It’s days like this I feel chained to this house and a handmaiden to Her Royal 3ft. Highness.

This weekend, there is a 24 hr. science-fiction movie marathon in town. Aaron has gone to this every year since he was a kid, so of course he must be there. I don’t know if he’d even be willing to leave if I went into labor, because, let’s face it – the movie marathon was a part of his life long before I was. I can’t blame him – he and the marathon are only a few years from their Silver Anniversary.

In our child-free years, I loved going with him to the movie marathon each year. It’s a fun mix of good sci-fi movies combined with a lot of cheesy B-movies from the 40’s and 50’s, sprinkles with some short-subject features in-between. In other words, it’s a geek’s paradise. Once Cordy was born, it was more difficult for me to keep going, because we had a baby that needed cared for. I missed one entirely, and the other I went to the daytime part of the marathon, but then had to go home for the overnight part of it to relieve the babysitter.

This year, we bought a ticket for me, but it looks like I don’t get to spend much time there at all. My mom was my babysitter, but decided that she was only staying until 4pm today. The marathon started at noon, and I had to work until 1pm today, so I saw a grand total of half a movie. My aunt has agreed to watch Cordy tomorrow morning, so I can go back and watch the very last movie tomorrow morning.

As I was expressing my disappointment to my mom, she sighed and said to me, “Tough luck. You’ve got a kid now, so you can’t just go out and do shit like this anymore.” The words stung as much as a slap in the face. This was the first time she’s said it so matter-of-factly. When it comes to work or other important things, my family is always willing to help with babysitting, but when I ask them to watch Cordy so Aaron and I can do something fun, I’m often met with an unsaid disapproval, as if I no longer should have the right to do anything fun.

I know that having kids means sacrifice. You can’t do as much as you used to, you have more responsibility, blah, blah, blah. But I don’t remember signing away my entire freedom as a human being when I became a mom. And I don’t feel like I should have to give up everything that makes me “me” just because I’ve added the title of “mommy”.

I already feel like a shell of my former self – in discussing hobbies with Aaron last night, it occurred to me that he still has several hobbies that he enjoys, while I can barely think of any that I still do. Oh sure, there’s blogging, and every now and then I’ll break out my knitting. But if I had to make a list of my interests right this minute, it would be a pretty small list compared to the list I could have made 5-7 years ago.

Believe me, I hate asking people to babysit. I’m aware that no one finds Cordy as charming as we do, and I always feel guilty asking friends or family to give up their free time to sit at our house while Cordy pesters them for “Bwue’s Baby Bwudder?” and “ice cweam!” Because of this, date nights and time away are carefully considered before asking anyone. I do understand that as parents we can’t run out to dinner and a show anytime we want, and we try to balance our need to get out with our responsibilities.

But sometimes that hollow feeling inside of me reaches a near-vacuum state, forcing me to get out and do something fun with friends or (gasp!) spend time with my husband as a couple and not just as parents. And if I’m denied the chance to ease that emptiness, the darkness of depression flows over me and I’m left stuck at home in tears, resenting being a parent even though I know deep down that I’d never want to give up being a parent for anything.

It’s not like I want to go out to wild parties every weekend. Just a little time here and there would be nice. I don’t think that’s too much to ask. And I don’t think it’s fair to believe that parents have no right to do something fun now and then because they have a child. Who can live under the pressure of being all mommy, all the time?

Do you ever, occasionally, miss the freedom from your child-free days? How do you keep your own identity from being lost in mommydom?

Filed Under: big issues, more than parents


Apr 13, 2007

New Reviews

April 13, 2007 By

Been over to visit my reviews blog lately? If not, you’re missing out on some interesting products, such as:

– a family calendar software system that almost guarantees your husband will pay attention and use it

– diapers that can survive a long overnight on a toddler with an enormous bladder and the need for three cups of juice before bed

– a good-for-you cereal that doesn’t taste like cardboard

Go check them out!

Filed Under: shameless promotion


Apr 13, 2007

Gross Moments in Parenting #37

April 13, 2007 By

I’ve started seeing a chiropractor in the hopes she can help turn this baby using the Webster technique. However, this means making frequent visits, when I don’t always have a babysitter. “No problem, bring your daughter!” the office told me.

I was nervous about this, but did it anyway today. The office is very child-friendly, with a large basket full of toys, and a cute painted wooden table, with small cubby-holes built in the top of the table to hold crayons. There was a chance Cordy wouldn’t realize it was a doctor’s office and freak out.

We walked in, and she saw the toys right away. I let her wander over to the table as I signed in and spoke with the receptionist.

“Wook! Crayons!”

“Yes, Cordy, I see. There are crayons.”

“And fishies!”

(not paying full attention) “And fishies. That’s nice.”

*crunch, crunch, crunch* Uh-oh.

I snapped my head around to see what she was doing. “Cordy, what did you just eat?” I can only imagine how bug-eyed I looked. How did she find something to eat?

Cordy gave a big smile and exclaimed, “A fishie!” She then reached back into the crayon cubby-hole in the table, looking for another treat.

I could feel my stomach churning. “Oh, sweetie, we don’t eat food we find laying around. Yuck!”

The receptionist gave me a sympathetic smile. “It’s OK. I think the Goldfish has only been there since this morning.”

Gee, thanks. That’s so comforting.

The ninja toddler strikes again, this time spotting the one shred of food in a waiting room and getting it into her mouth before I could notice. Ick.

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