Where’d She Go?

Forgive me, readers, for I have sinned. It’s been a week since my last confession post.

What have I been up to? Well, last week was a busy week for me work-wise, and ended with Aaron leaving on Thursday morning for a trip to a stage combat workshop in Virginia Beach. He didn’t get back until very late last night. Four days, one hyperactive toddler, and one eight-months-pregnant mom who was parenting solo.

You can understand why blogging was not high on my priority list. Most nights I was too exhausted to even fix myself dinner. Single parents – you deserve a medal. While Cordy was thankfully well-behaved most of the weekend, the experience left me begging for Aaron to come home as soon as possible. I learned I’m officially not cut out for parenting solo.

Friday I also went to look at the one daycare in town that supposedly had an opening right away. Turns out, they didn’t – they had one day a week available, not two. But after looking at the place, I decided it wasn’t for us, anyway. They wanted to charge $485 a month for two days a week, and they didn’t even provide meals. You had to pack your own breakfasts and lunches. Plus, if the weather is bad, there is no indoor playroom, and the kids are confined to their classrooms. I also asked about naptime, and they told me if a child doesn’t nap, she has to sit on her cot quietly during nap time. I tried not to laugh at them, but I couldn’t hold back. You want my daughter to sit quietly for an hour and a half? Yeah, right.

Today was my regular OB appointment. Even though I’ve eaten my weight in doughnuts this week, I somehow lost two pounds. So I’m back to my starting weight. I had plenty of reserves to begin with, so my doctor isn’t concerned at all.

However, there was one downside to the appointment today. Somehow, in the past week, this baby has managed to do the one and only thing I didn’t want her to do:

She’s now breech.

Yes, Cordy was breech, which is why I had my c-section. The chances of two breech babies? Well, had I bet on another breech, I’d be rich.

Why must I be cursed with stubborn daughters? This one wasn’t breech last week, because I could feel the kicks up high. But today the hard lump of a head is now up high, while small feet are Irish dancing on my cervix.

I’m 33 weeks today, so there is still time and room for her to turn back. And unlike last time, I refuse to sit by and just hope she’ll turn. I’m breaking out every trick in the book. I will prop my butt up on the couch with my head on the floor twice a day. I will put frozen peas on the top of my stomach and a heating pad on the lower area to convince her my cervix is a better place for her head. If needed, I have found an acupuncture office who performs moxibustion, and I’m looking into chiropractors who are skilled in the Webster technique. I’m determined to get this kid head down, even if it means chanting some silly phrase while wearing a hula skirt and moose antlers.

So, forgive me for my absence here. It was a much needed leave of absence so that I could focus on all the things stressing me out. As penance, I’ll let you in on a secret: click here to go see the current top two baby names we have sort-of agreed on thus far. And next up I’ll be answering a series of interview questions given to me by Mrs. Chicky.



Love Your Babysitter

A child care provider you can trust is one of the most valuable things you can have as a parent. It may be someone to provide full-time care, part-time care, or just the occasional date night. Whether you need the care for work, or just for a little time off, knowing you can leave your child with this provider without any fear is something to be thankful for every day.

Which is why I’ve been feeling a slight panic over the the past few weeks. My friend L has watched Cordy for me one or two days a week for nearly a year and a half. She and I have been friends for over 10 years, and she has a son slightly older than Cordy. I’d describe her parenting style as just as overprotective, or more so, than me, which makes me feel completely safe leaving Cordy with her. I know that my daughter is lovingly cared for in her home, with her every need covered, with plenty of attention and guidance, and with another child for company.

However, all of that is now changing. Due to some sad events, L and her long-term partner are splitting up. She has been lucky to be a stay at home mom ever since her son was born, but now she must find a new apartment, and will have to find a full-time job to support her son. Her retired mom moved up to Ohio from Arizona just a few weeks ago, and will take care of watching L’s son while she works, but it does mean Cordy is without a babysitter two days a week.

I have been helping my friend as much as possible with getting on with her life – watching her son so she could go fill out paperwork and meet with assistance counselors, finding jobs for her to apply for, helping with apartment searches, etc. And while I am happy to be there for her, I am also mourning the loss of my trusted child care provider.

L’s job hunt has been slow going, and so she is now looking at temp agencies, which means that any day now I could find out that Cordy has no one to watch her. My own search for a replacement child care provider is also going slowly, too. We don’t have any other family or friends we could turn to for this amount of childcare, and while I’m sure there are several in-home providers who are perfectly nice people, I am too paranoid to trust a stranger alone with my child.

I’ve called several daycare centers and preschools (all of the NAEYC accredited ones, of course), but most have no openings for at least 6-8 months. Of the fifteen or so that I contacted, one had an opening, and I’m touring the center on Friday. My other option is to beg Aaron’s aunt for help again. She is an asst. director for an early childhood learning center, and she was the one we turned to when Cordy was three months old and my old job suddenly cut off telecommuting for all employees. We’re hoping she might find a spot for Cordy at her center.

The other issue affecting our decision is the cost involved. The one center with the opening is asking $485 a month for care two days a week. That’s a lot more than we currently pay L, and probably more than we can afford. My mother watches Cordy during the other day I work, but for now can’t help out more than one day a week due to her work schedule. Quitting my job is not an option at this point either.

Somehow, it will all work out. This is pretty poor timing – had it been two months later, Cordy could have stayed home with me during maternity leave, and we would have more time to find more options. But L needs to get out on her own, and I understand the struggle she’s going through. I plan to keep searching out other possibilities, and I know we will find a solution eventually. I’m thankful for the year and a half that L was able to watch Cordy, and I know that Cordy benefited from that time with her.

If you have a babysitter or child care provider you like and trust, be sure to tell them thank you for all they do. Because you never know when you could find yourself without that trusted caregiver, and finding someone else you could put that much trust in is often hard to do.



Just Call Me (Hopefully) Nurse Mommy

It seems that, amid all the stress we’ve been going through lately (which is another post entirely, and will be coming, I promise), there is still good to be found. Not only am I now in the ranks of paid bloggers, but I also just found out that this fall I will be starting nursing school.

This has been in the works for over a year, and some of you may remember when I first started out on this journey. I’ve slowly been taking classes here and there, working on the prerequisites needed to even apply for the program. I finished those prerequisites this past fall, just in time to meet the deadline for applications to the online nursing program.

My local college offers an online program for those who already have a bachelor’s degree in something else, and are seeking a career change. All of the lecture is done online, and then labs and clinicals are scheduled for one day a week. The beauty of this is that it means I can still go to school without having to juggle crazy babysitting schedules, and without quitting my current job. I can find time in my schedule to commit to one day a week.

Getting into the program wasn’t a sure thing. They only offer admission to the program once a year, and there are roughly 50 spots available, when generally about 150-200 people apply. The three biggest factors for snagging a spot are your grades from your prerequisite classes, your grades from your first degree, and your scores on the Nurse Entrance Test. After that, there is also an essay that is considered as well. Luckily, I graduated with honors for my first degree, received nearly all A’s for my prerequisites (that damn Organic Chemistry class ended in a B), and scored high on the NET. Yet even with that, I still worried I might not get in.

The acceptance letter was such a welcome sight to see. Yes, I love writing and blogging, and will likely never give those up, but at the moment I can’t make a full living from them. And while my job as a student advisor is a personally rewarding job, it’s not that rewarding financially. I enjoy helping people, I enjoy making a difference, and nursing will give me the ability to do those things, all the while probably making more money part-time than any full-time job I’ve ever had paid.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not going into it just for the money. My mom is a medical technologist, and I grew up hanging out at the local hospital, so I know how hard nurses work. After having Cordy, I also came to admire the work of the nurses on the OB floors. But the money is a factor I must consider when it comes to providing for our family. Aaron wants to go back to school, also, and once I get through nursing school, he will have that opportunity.

We’ve already been discussing the possibility of me quitting my job in the fall, too. Writing three blogs (and looking for more to write), going to school part-time, raising two children, and working part-time outside the home may just be too much for me. The biggest time drain, with the least amount of myself invested, for all of those would be my job. If Aaron gets a raise (which he’s already due for, if they would ever complete his review), if we pay down our debt, and if I continue to find writing work, it is possible that I could quit. It’s certainly a goal worth aiming for.

So, what does all of this mean to you? Depending on how things go, it could mean a few things. First, I won’t be giving up blogging, as this is my one true outlet to turn to when I need to relax. It could mean that I’ll have a whole bunch of new school stories to share in the future (only the funny ones, of course). If the stories are boring, it could mean nothing – the status quo as I continue to do what I’m doing now. Or it could mean you’ll get an interesting glimpse of someone breaking down from too much stress, as all of the hats I’m juggling turn to stone and crash down on me. Let’s hope for one of the first two, shall we?



When Sleep Wins Out

Cordy came down with a cold over the weekend, and along with the fountain of snot and coughing came an inhuman resistance to authority. She’s been more grumpy than normal, and suggestions of doing anything that might be good for her are met with a hissing “Nnnnnoooo!”

The other night, she was clearly tired, but any attempts to convince her it was bedtime ended in screaming. Seeing the pure exhaustion in her face, we knew it was only a matter of time, so we let the issue drop, expecting her to fall asleep on the couch when she finally couldn’t take it anymore. But she knew the couch meant bedtime, too, and so she continued fighting her body until she could no longer fight.

This is where she gave up the battle:

When you’re sick and very tired, you can fall asleep anywhere.

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In other news, I had the unpleasant experience of being in a minor car accident yesterday. Nothing like a fender-bender while pregnant to scare the bejeebus out of you. You can read the whole story over at Family.com.



Real Moms

I was tagged by Mrs. Chicken for Kristen’s Real Moms meme. I had to think about this one for a little bit, and then settled on this:

Real Moms Teach Self-Reliance.




Oh sure, Cordy could have brought that box of cereal over to me in order to get a snack. (Note: even though she’s still in [mismatched] PJs, she had already had breakfast that morning.) But instead, I told her to open the box herself, and after a minute of trying to figure it out, she got the box open and found her own way to the frosted goodness inside.

And while I love my daughter dearly, and gladly do many things for her, having her do something on her own without whining at me to do it for her? That is progress, and a sign of being a real mom. Real moms teach their kids how to do things on their own. It’s part of growing up, and it doesn’t hurt that it means we have a little more time for ourselves, too. After all, it’s not all noble sacrifice.

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This week I was also awarded a Thinking Blogger award by Mrs. Chicky.


It feels rewarding to know that my words are making others think and, hopefully, grow as a result. I suppose it’s possible I just make people think about all of the bad writing out there, but I’d like to think it’s more than that.

As goes the award, you must give when you receive. And so I’d like to bestow the award on a few more bloggers who often have me pondering their posts for days, or sometimes just nodding my head furiously until my neck hurts:

Kate at Eucalyptus Pillow
Izzy at Izzymom
Erin at Queen of Spain
Dutch & Wood at Sweet Juniper
Julie at The Ravin’ Picture Maven

Enjoy the award, folks!

Oh, and for those who were asking, Family.com is now live. Be sure to check it out.