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Oct 5, 2008

Spooky and Kooky Days of the Week

October 5, 2008 By

In four short years, I’ve had to listen to a lot of music designed for kids. Some of it is fun, some of it I’d even call enjoyable, but I find the best songs are the ones that actually teach kids something in the process.

I’m volunteering at Cordy’s preschool one morning a week right now, which has been a great opportunity to see exactly what Cordy’s learning while there. I like to see the teaching methods used so I can copy them at home for some consistency. And I discovered that her teacher has a fun sense of humor when using music to teach.

My first morning there, Cordy’s teacher had them gather for circle time, and she asked them to sing the Days of the Week song. As they started singing, I suddenly realized that I knew the tune. And it wasn’t a tune I was expecting to hear, either. I had to stifle giggles while they sang it.

I learned that day that you can really take any tune at all and put new words to it to make it fun for kids. Since then, we sing it around the house, too, and I’ll share it with all of you:

Days of the Week
(Sung to the Addams Family song – if your kids can’t snap, claps work just fine)

Days of the week *snap**snap*
Days of the week *snap**snap*
Days of the week, days of the week, days of the week *snap**snap*
There’s Sunday and there’s Monday
There’s Tuesday and there’s Wednesday
There’s Thursday and there’s Friday
And then there’s Saturday
Days of the week *snap**snap*
Days of the week *snap**snap*
Days of the week, days of the week, days of the week *snap**snap*

This post was written for Parent Bloggers Network as an entry for a contest sponsored by Bush’s Beans. They’re giving away two $500 gift cards to Best Buy this weekend – that could wrap up a lot of my holiday shopping this year!

Filed Under: Cordy, daily life, school


Oct 4, 2008

Moments We’re Not Proud Of

October 4, 2008 By

Many of you may read Catherine of Her Bad Mother, and you probably know that she’s been having a rough time lately. This parenting gig isn’t always baby giggles and butt wiggles – we often discover some of the deepest, darkest parts of ourselves on this journey, too. Ali recently wrote a post to lend some support to Catherine in an “I’ve been there” kinda way, and I wanted to share my story, too.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve scared myself with my own thoughts. Times when I was pushed beyond the breaking point by a late night crying session that was seemingly endless, or a child who simply wouldn’t do what I needed her to do. I don’t know if that says that I’m not well-suited to being a parent, or simply have a short fuse.

My worst moments were a little over a year ago, before Cordy was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum and when she was at the height of her out-of-body, demonic possession tantrums. I know now that she couldn’t control herself – when she hit that right combination of sensory overload, all higher functions seemed to step out for awhile, leaving the primitive brain in charge for awhile. It was hard to see her like that, but it was also frustrating for me, and inconvenient, and often embarrassing when we were in public.

Her primal screaming, kicking, biting, and resisting me tested all of my limits of tolerance and patience. Many times I’d partially lose control, yelling at her and handling her roughly just to drag her out of the house or force her into her car seat. But more than once I can clearly remember snapping, suddenly noticing my hand up in the air, poised and ready to strike. I was shocked at my own in-the-moment instinct: the desire to hurt her – to beat her – was there, and it scared me more than any tantrum she has ever thrown.

I’m thankful that I was able to recognize the line and step away before crossing it and doing something I might forever regret. Those moments still bother me – I often torture myself for even thinking such things. What kind of a mom thinks of beating her child?

The truth is, many parents have these thoughts, and we shouldn’t judge ourselves or others for thinking them. Thoughts and actions are two very different things, and even though I might have been angry enough to carry out my irresponsible wishes, I didn’t do it. A different kind of instinct took over at that point – mother’s instinct.

And while I laugh about those long nights when Cordy was a baby, when Aaron and I discussed driving out to a cornfield and leaving her there, I also acknowledge that there were moments where I scared myself with violent thoughts. Recognizing where that escalation beyond frustration into violence begins, though, has helped me from reaching that point again. I’m not a great mother, but I do know I’m a pretty good mom, doing the best I can each day.

Although I still threaten to leave them in a cornfield.

What are your darkest moments of parenting? Write a post about it, leave a comment here, or e-mail Ali if you want to do it anonymously (details at her post here). And be sure to visit Catherine and lend her your support as well.

Filed Under: being a mom, Cordy Tagged With:


Sep 28, 2008

Mom or Zookeeper – What’s The Difference?

September 28, 2008 By

When I was little, I wanted to work in a zoo. I loved everything about animals, and knew that no matter what, the only job that would be right for me would be one that involved caring for animals somehow. At first it was a vet. Then I wanted to be a zoo keeper after spending a summer at zoo camp. After that it was a marine biologist after a visit to Sea World.

Now when I think back on that first career choice (followed by many, many others), I realize that being a mom really isn’t that far off from zoo keeper. Oh sure, the animals I’m in charge of are directly related to me by birth, but you’d be surprised by many of the similarities.

First off, I spend most of the day dealing with keeping them in their pens. I set up gates around the house to protect Mira from certain doom, and protect precious electronics from her as well. Then I move them to their outdoor pen (aka: the backyard) where they can play in the safety of the fenced-in yard. I’m also in charge of keeping their habitats cleaned each day.

Mira is still non-verbal, so just like a wild animal I can never be sure what she’ll do next, requiring me to always be on my toes. When she needs something, I have to carefully study her body language and behavior to figure out what she’s trying to tell me.

At feeding time, I put together healthy, nutritious meals for my little animals. They pace back and forth like lions while I make meals, anxiously awaiting the tasty treats on the counter. When they get their food they tear into it, with no concern about manners or keeping their faces clean. And like a zoo keeper, I have to ask others to please not feed the animals, because food other than what I prepared for them can often make them sick. (Especially Cordy’s food allergies.)

Of course, while I have to keep them safe and healthy, I also want my children to have as much fun as possible. And this is where they truly act like zoo animals. Or more specifically, monkeys and bears. During the “witching hour” (most moms know what this is, right?), they always start out as monkeys, jumping up and down, shouting loudly, bouncing off of everything as they burn off that late-day energy. But by the end of the witching hour, just before dinner and bedtime, they become bears, wrestling each other for fun, each trying to overpower her sister.

Let the wrestling begin.

And just like any good zookeeper, I love the ones I care for. I may not always like my job, and my little animals can (often) get on my nerves with their crazy behavior, but at the end of the day when they’re happily asleep in their beds, I sit back and think how lucky I am to do the job I wanted to do.

Are you living in a zoo? If so, join in on this blog blast, sponsored by the Parent Bloggers Network and Generation Next’s new iKnow Animals, Letters & Sounds DVD collection. You could win a copy of the DVDs, along with a $250 Visa gift card. The blog blast ends at midnight tonight.

Filed Under: Cordy, daily life, Mira Tagged With:


Sep 24, 2008

Signs of a Good Birthday Party

September 24, 2008 By

A cake, designed by the birthday girl:


Ice cream to go with the cake (with Phat Mommy ice cream scoop):


Baby bird mouth:


Sugar highs:


Cool gifts:


Hanging with friends:

Per the birthday girl’s request, we didn’t sing Happy Birthday, making it the perfect day for her. And with an entire day without a single shriek, cry or meltdown, it was the perfect day for me as well.

Filed Under: Cordy, growing up


Sep 22, 2008

Forty Years Ago, I Would Have Starved

September 22, 2008 By

There are times when I read food blogs and drool over the amazing looking food those bloggers prepare. I’ve even bookmarked a few recipes that looked too good to pass over.

But let’s be honest: will I ever make any of those dishes? Probably not. Because while the pictures on those blogs make me salivate, I know deep down that I would likely come close to burning the house down were I to attempt to make one of them. I suck as a cook. Seriously – domestic zero. There’s a reason that sandwiches are the most common lunch around here. They do not require heat from any kitchen appliance to be applied to them, meaning I can usually handle it.

So when I think of the one modern convenience I can’t live without, it would be my microwave oven. While I’m a disaster around a stovetop, I can work magic in a microwave. If it can be microwaved, I’ll make it.

And thankfully, microwaves have come a long way from frozen meals and popcorn. Need something steamed? My microwave steamer bowl can handle that. Want to cook corn or have a baked potato? I can wrap them in a moist paper towel and microwave them to perfection in under five minutes. Baked goods? Betty Crocker has an entire line of desserts designed to bake in the microwave. Child wants mac n cheese? No problem – Easy Mac is ready in three and a half minutes.

Hell, I’m even hard-boiling eggs in my microwave. (I always cracked them when I boiled them on the stove.)

Beyond food, I’ve sterilized silicone nipples and breast pump parts and melted down crayons in a microwave. As a child, I discovered why you don’t put metal in a microwave, too – an amazing lesson in physical science! I’ve also seen games played using a microwave. (If you’ve never participated in Peep Jousting, you really must.)

I need my microwave. It’s the primary cooking appliance in my kitchen. Without it, my family would be living on nothing but cold cuts and PB&J sandwiches.

What about you? What modern conveniences can’t you live without?

(Indoor plumbing was my second choice, but I thought a microwave was a little nicer to write about.)

This post is part of the PBN blog blast this weekend. Get your entry in before midnight for a chance to win a gift card, courtesy of Yoplait Kids.

Filed Under: domestic zero, me me me