What Happens When Your Furby Becomes Evil

In the weeks leading up to Christmas, Mira had one toy that kept coming to the top of her list: a Furby. Other items on the list would change, but a pink Furby was always there for anyone who asked, including Santa, who got an earful about how much she really wanted a Furby.

So when Christmas arrived, she was overjoyed to get a hot pink Furby from Santa. (Cordy got a blue Furby, too.)

Now, there are a few things they don’t tell parents about the Furby. First, it has no off button. At all. The only way to immediately silence it is to take out the batteries, which requires a screwdriver. And you know that right when you want it to shut up is the same time that all screwdrivers in the house go missing.

Otherwise, you have to wait for it to fall asleep, or force it to go to sleep by placing it in a dark, quiet area and ignoring it. Once it’s asleep, you mustn’t move it or bump it at all, or it will wake up again.

The Furby also has no volume control. At all. It’s loud all the time.  And most of the time it speaks Furbish, which seems to be some kind of cross between baby talk and pig latin.

Basically, it’s the toy equivalent of a colicky baby.

I did know some of this going into our purchase of this toy. But I did not know about all of the enhancements from the previous 1998 version. The LED eyes are cool and provide the ability for more expression of personality. It has more sensors to detect touch. And it can change personality.

The old Furby would have some change in personality based on how you treated it, but this one goes far beyond that with a multiple personality disorder. It has several very distinct personalities and doesn’t come with the Furby anti-psychotic drugs it desperately needs.

Mira’s Furby started out as the furry hot pink version of a valley girl. A little annoying, but kinda cute. She fed it on demand and used the iPad app to translate what it was saying, and it slowly learned a little English, too. Well, a version of English better suited to the movie Clueless, perhaps.

After the second or third day, it had the first personality shift. I didn’t see it happen, but suddenly it was speaking like a cowboy and mooing at us, with chicks and cows appearing in the LED eyes at times. Mira found that hilarious and I suffered through the noise because she liked this toy so much.

The next day it was back to a valley girl again, and even seemed to name itself Coco. It gave itself a name? It was becoming more sentient with each passing day.

And then, in the middle of Mira trying to teach it to dance, something very bad happened. It started to shake back and forth, it made weird noises, and it’s LED eyes were flashing like strobe lights. I thought it was either having a grand mal seizure or we broke the damn thing.

Furby, mid-panic attack

Then it stopped. All was silent for a moment. And then what was in front of us was a Furby who no longer had the high-pitched girly voice, but instead a deep, growling voice with angry looking eyes.

Coco isn’t here anymore.

Mira’s Furby was suddenly possessed by a new personality who was mean. It growled at her, it snapped at her with an angry voice if she tried to pet it, and it made retching noises when she tried to feed it, as if the iPad foods weren’t good enough for it. Occasionally it showed little flames in its eyes.

WTF happened? Did we feed it after midnight?

It was now a Furby demon. And Mira was scared of it. She backed away with tears in her eyes, her five year old mind unable to comprehend what had happened to her cheery dance pal, saying she wanted her nice Furby back, and she didn’t want to play with it anymore.

So her new electronic pet wasn’t working out as well as she wanted, which means it was now my responsibility to care for. Figures. I felt like I had brought home Chucky from Child’s Play to my daughter.

Sorry for the dark photos – it apparently has a feature that prevents paparazzi from getting good photos of it, too. Little bastard.

So as I sat there, with Damien the Dark Furby glaring at me from across the room, I did what any good mom would do: I googled “How to make a Furby nice again?”

I can assure you I’m NOT alone in this type of google search.

There were a lot of suggestions about different things to try. I gathered up the little ball of hate and tried petting the dumb thing several times. I will hug you and love you until you are sweet again! It growled and yelled at me each time while my dog stared at me in confusion, wondering why I was petting a loud toy instead of him. Yes, Cosmo, you’re smarter than the humans. Still no change from the Furby. I was a little worried it might try to bite me.

Mira was still across the room, asking me to make it nice again, but too afraid to come near it. WHO MAKES A TOY THAT KIDS ARE SCARED OF? What programmer thought that a sociopath personality would be a SUPER FUN for kids? I’d like to drag that person over to our house and let him/her console my five year old and explain the reasoning for this.

Then I remembered Mira really wanted her Furby to sing and like music. Some links suggested music can change the personality. So I put it in front of the iPad, cranked the volume, and subjected the little electronic Lucifer to Owl City followed by ABBA. He growled and hissed at this musical exorcism at first, but slowly started to dance along to the music. You know, that grudging, too-cool-for-school-kid dance where he doesn’t want to admit he likes Mama Mia.

Near the end of the second song, the Furby’s eyes flashed and it shook again, and suddenly the pop star personality appeared. This one has a softer voice than the valley girl and likes to sing a lot. Let me repeat: A LOT. And instantly, all Furby offenses had been forgiven by the formerly terrified kindergartener. Mira had been hoping her Furby would sing and ran across the room to scoop up her prized possession now that it was no longer, well, possessed.

Stupid Furby.

Since then it’s slipped back to the dark side once, which then fell to me to fix again. Music does seem to be the trick to force it back to being a “nice” Furby again. Mira loves the pop star personality – hers named itself Boo – which is the least offensive personality as far as Furby personalities go.

Aww, isn’t she sweet with those hearts in her eyes? That’s how she lures you to your DOOM.

Cordy’s Furby hasn’t changed personalities once. It prefers to be a valley girl/comedian hybrid and doesn’t want to change.Which is both annoying and OK, all at the same time. I’d rather deal with devil I know rather than the devil it might become.

Luckily, the hours between Furby playtimes have already stretched into days. I’m hoping they will eventually lose interest with these gremlins before my personality changes.

This has to be my mother’s revenge for the Teddy Ruxpin I adored as a kid, right? Only it’s revenge with 30 years of interest. I’d better start planning for the next generation now.

Or the Furby will enslave our Skylanders to do what it commands with it’s sweet, chipper voice and I’ll be doomed forever.



Snow Days

This winter has already proven to be far better than last winter. The day after Christmas, the snow started, and kept coming in intervals of every couple of days until the new year, leaving us with a lovely blanket of the white stuff.

With the past few winters being fairly dry and lacking in snow, Mira hasn’t had a lot of experience with it, and Cordy’s experiences are vague at best. Once they saw it on the ground, it didn’t take long before they were asking to go play in it. I bought them snowsuits and new boots and decided that since it was winter break, we’d make the most of our time with the snow.

This was also Cosmo’s first experience with anything more than a dusting of snow. He nervously pawed at the snow at first, but seeing the kids run out into it helped him get over any fear.

About to be knocked over by a dog running full force.

The next day, we decided to take the kids sledding. There’s a local sledding hill that apparently a large percentage of Columbus decided to visit with this new-found snow. During the drive, we created an image of how awesome sledding was for the kids, and how much they would love it.

At the hill, Aaron took them both up the hill to wait in line while I stood near the bottom to meet them when they came down. Mira was the first one down the hill – it’s hard to see, but she’s the one in the middle of the screen after a few seconds on the pink circle sled. Also? You can watch with the sound off so you don’t hear the people beside me yelling to their friends across the hill:

She was a little scared after clipping a few people at the end, but wanted to try one more time. Cordy had a harder crash on her first trip down, colliding with another sled on the way down. She was also shaken and scared to try again, but she also agreed to give it another try.

Parents, a helpful tip: if you must wait for your children at the bottom of the hill, stand to the side or far enough back that you don’t serve as an obstacle for the uncontrolled projectiles coming down the hill. I can’t count the number of adults who served as an abrupt stopping point for random kids, and many of the adults were then upset that the kid crashed into them. If you do choose to stand in their way, pay attention to the hill and move if someone is coming your way.

Mira’s second attempt ended poorly. Two other kids had collided and stopped halfway down the hill. Mira’s round sled hit another little girl just as she stood up, taking her off of her legs again and landing on top of Mira’s head. But Mira kept going, finally ending her rough journey by slamming into a group of adults and a sled they were holding. (No photos of that because I saw the crash coming and put the phone away!)

I was still comforting Mira and wiping away her tears when Aaron got Cordy into position. I tried to wave to Aaron that maybe we needed a break, but I was lost in the crowd and Cordy came down the hill again.

Thanks to all of the snow being packed, she picked up speed quickly. I was trying to run to her to help stop her, as well as yell to a group of people to watch out, but they didn’t move. Cordy hit them but had enough momentum to keep going. I jumped right into another group of people and grabbed Cordy’s coat just as she hit me and bumped the people next to me.

At that point I felt like an awful parent as both kids told us they hated sledding and wanted to go home. We had been there for less than half an hour, and they were now hurting and traumatized by sledding. So much for that awesomely fun experience, eh?

My mom came to the rescue a few days later, suggesting they go to my aunt’s new house and try sledding on the little hills around her house. There were no obstacles, no crowds of people – they could even have their own hills! (Why didn’t we think to do that in the first place?)

It took a lot of coaxing, but they now like sledding again. Cordy won’t try anything larger than a speed bump, but at least she’s willing to try the sled again.

This weekend we all went back to my aunt’s for a little more quality time with the snow, bringing Cosmo with us as well. Squeals of joy and laughter were heard all morning.

I’m so happy to have the snow back this winter.



The Last Week In Photos (and A Little Text)

Whoa, hey, how’s it going? Amazing how fast December can fly by when your to-do list is a mile long, right?

We’re in the first week of winter break here, which in our house results in two kids who are really hyper, with one of them having a very hard time being off of her usual routine. I’m doing my best to control the chaos, which would be a lot easier if I could remember where I stored their snow boots from last year so they could go play in the snow.

I’m a little short on words, so here’s a photo journal of the last week.

We went to the zoo for Wild Lights and of course had to see the polar bears:

Unfortunately, we learned that the excitement of zoo lights can sometimes be too much for a five year old. She hasn’t had a potty accident for a year and a half, but she was so excited she forgot to tell us she needed to pee until it was too late. So I spent half an hour in a cold bathroom with her while Aaron ran to the gift shop to spend way too much money on sweat pants and socks.

We didn’t get to see as many of the lights as we had planned.

Next, Cosmo got a check-up at the vet, and we celebrated having him with us for one year.

He’s quite dashing in his sweater. He may weigh 95+ pounds, but he has little fur and gets cold easily.
I then had an experiment in baking and made candied almonds. Amazingly, it turned out delicious:

Recipe can be found here.

Mira watched The Wizard of Oz for the first time over the weekend. Other than the wicked witch, she liked it.

She liked cuddling on the couch with Cosmo, too.

Christmas Eve was spent with extended family at my cousin’s house. We enjoyed catching up with everyone and Cordy and Mira had fun playing with the other kids.

Getting them to hold still for a photo was tough, though.

Christmas Day was filled with the tearing of wrapping paper and squeals of joy.

Unwrapping their Furby toys.

Cuddleuppet, Tooth Fairy pillow, and a very happy Mira.

Also on Christmas Day, Aaron and I slipped away to go see the movie Les Miserables. Amazing movie. I loved it, even if I sobbed through a large part of it. It’s very similar to the stage musical, only now the actors are up close and the emotion is super intense.

I’ve seen the musical a few times and know it by heart, so I also had to resist the urge to criticize any cuts to the score or changing of lyrics.

And then, the day after Christmas, the snow came.

Now if only I could find our snow boots.

How has your week been?



A Love Letter To A Dog

It was just over a year ago that our family visited the local shelter for their Mingle with the Mutts event. It’s a chance to see the dogs that the shelter has for adoption, and local rescue groups are given space to bring their dogs as well.

Until that point we were strictly a cat family. Our Siamese cats acted like dogs, anyway. But the thought of adding a dog to the family had been growing, helped by professionals telling us that a dog could be good therapy for Cordy, and a good way to teach responsibility for both kids. I spent some evenings staring at Petfinder, and this one sad-eyed puppy face kept popping up on my screen with every search.

The wrinkled brow and those floppy ears got me.

It was at Mingle with the Mutts that we first met Cosmo. He was late to the party, and all four of us had already found (separate) dogs we were in love with. When we met the little pup who connected with my heart online, I thought…maybe this dog is a little too crazy for us.

Unlike some of the other puppies at the event, he was all over the place, pulling hard at the leash and trying to lick every face he could get to. His energy was tremendous. And Cordy loved him at first sight.

Places to go, people to sniff…

Even though I was concerned about his energy, and Aaron really liked another dog we saw, we arranged for Cosmo to come over for a home visit. He was still bursting with puppy energy and at that visit we learned the finer points of puppy-proofing as he sniffed out and ate three crayons while he was here. (He still has a supernatural ability to find – and eat – lost crayons.) We were convinced we wouldn’t be approved to adopt based on that incident, and there were also other families who had put in applications to adopt him.

Somehow, they thought it was a good fit and we received an email saying we were approved. Just before Christmas, our first dog joined the family and we began adjusting to life with a dog.

It hasn’t been easy. Cosmo had mastered many of his puppy manners, thank goodness – he was housebroken and crate trained and knew a few commands. But he was still a five month old puppy, and a puppy who had been found on the streets nearly starved to death. The puppy we met at 25 pounds was 40 pounds when he came to live with us and 60 pounds a month later. He’s now over 90 pounds and still considers himself a lap dog.

He’s chewed up pillows and blankets. The kids have learned that all stuffed animals and small toys must be kept off the floor or he will chew them. Despite my original plan that he wouldn’t be allowed on the furniture, he has claimed the couches and can often be found stretched out asleep on them. And he still tries to lick our faces.

But after a year, I can’t imagine life without him. He’s so patient with the kids, even if they handle him too rough occasionally. He’s helped provide a new source of love for Cordy – she can turn to him for comfort when the human world is too overwhelming, and he’s right there to accept her love.

He’s given Mira a purpose, and she happily accepts the responsibility of feeding him and letting him in and out. He even listens to Mira when she issues commands, which is impressive when you consider he’s twice her weight.

Future dog whisperer?

While I work during the day, Cosmo often sits next to me and rests his head on my arm. If anyone is down or sick, he’s right there beside them. He’s always ready for a game of fetch or a walk, and when we’re happy he absorbs that feeling and acts like that puppy we first met.

I should add that the cats have not been forgotten. They all get along relatively well. Dante, our older Siamese, is particularly fond of him.

I’ve also never had cleaner kitchen floors in my life. That dog lets no crumb remain on the floor.

Cosmo has also earned his keep as a fantastic guard dog. He barks at any outside threat (real or imagined…seriously, Cosmo, the squirrels are NOT a threat to us) and is the absolute best solution for getting door-to-door salesmen to accept “no thanks” the first time I say it.

He’s never been aggressive to any visitor to our house – he follows our cue that if we’re friendly with someone, he should be, too – but the occasional growl I hear from him when I’m nervous about a situation reassures me that if there ever was a real danger, he would try to protect us. 

Standing, er, resting guard on the couch.

He’s an absolute goof who usually wants nothing more than to please us and maybe get a few belly rubs. He can get in the way or be a bit of a punk at times, but overall his needs are so small. He asks very little from us and provides so much love in return.

After a year of having Cosmo in our lives, I can say with certainty now that I’m so happy we got a dog, and that we got this dog. I am a dog person now, and our family is better for having him with us.

I utterly love this silly mutt.

His current state as I write this.


What A Week

Last week at this time, I was expecting to have a relaxing Thanksgiving week. My only concern was for Wednesday, when the kids would be home from school while I was still working. I had an enormous to-do list with confidence that I would get it all done.

So then Cordy, who wasn’t feeling well Sunday night, woke up Monday morning with a high fever, cough, and headache. That meant she was home with me all day, on the couch with her Nintendo DS and watching numerous episodes of Beakman’s World on Netflix. I didn’t get as much done as I had planned because I was caring for her, too, but she clearly had the flu, so keeping her home was the right idea.

Cosmo kept watch, too.

That evening, right as she was fighting sleep on the couch, finally breaking a sweat after a 103.5 F fever, the cable/internet went out. As I tried to reset the cable box, my computer prompted me to restart for a Windows Update. I let the computer restart, hoping I could get my internet back again so that I could continue working.

But then the computer wouldn’t start again. It would try to restart, get to the point of loading Windows, hang, and then reboot. Safe Mode didn’t work, running diagnostics didn’t work…after fighting with it all night, I was computerless and lost an entire night of getting anything done.

Cordy was better on Tuesday, but still not well enough to go to school. Aaron took her with him to work, where she could hang out in his office with her games and books away from everyone else, while I figured out if my computer was dead or not. Aaron’s brother saved all of the data from the hard drive (YAY!), but the diagnosis was that the hard drive was dead.

The afternoon was spent researching new computers and working out how in the world we were going to afford a new laptop. I had been planning to buy a new laptop in a month or so, but this was just a little too early for me to be ready. Tuesday evening, I went computer shopping while Aaron entertained the kids, and by 9pm I finally had a new computer to resume my online life. The kids had no school the next day, but I hoped that at least most of my plan for the rest of the week would be back on.

I wish I could have got it without Windows 8.

And then Wednesday morning came and Aaron had been gifted with Cordy’s flu. Well…damn. To make it worse, we had my family coming over for Thanksgiving dinner the next day, and we had yet to finish cleaning the downstairs to prepare for the event.

I cranked through as much work as I could while tending to the chaos around me during the day on Wednesday. By 6pm, Aaron voluntarily went to bed feverish and achy after shivering on the couch all day. After I put the kids to bed, I dumped as much clutter as I could into boxes and hid it in the garage. (The perfect hiding place when you need a house de-cluttered quickly.)

Then I pulled out the Lysol wipes and Febreeze antimicrobial fabric spray, and completely wiped down the entire first floor of the house. No fabric or hard surface that anyone might possibly touch was forgotten. None of our visitors were going to leave with the flu. I finished this task (and a lot of internet surfing) around 3am and slept on the couch.

Thanksgiving went smoothly. Aaron was still too sick to come downstairs, so Mira and I ran care packages of food up to him while we feasted downstairs. It was great to spend time with family, although I felt bad that Aaron couldn’t join us.

I did participate in Black Friday shopping. I don’t really like the craziness or the crowds, but it does allow us to get great deals on things we need and gifts for others. Luckily, I got most of our shopping done online this year, but did have to go to the stores to get a few items for family members.

By Friday I was completely drained from the week. I had barely slept for days, I was mentally worn down from the stress of losing my computer and having my plans upended, and all I wanted to do was shut down. And for the most part I did.

It’s now Sunday night. I’m still playing catch up, but feel a little better. Everyone in the house is almost well again, and Mira and I escaped the flu. I hate having my plans changed – I can handle the little stuff, but with so many large roadblocks thrown at me this week, I wanted to scream.

Tomorrow morning the kids go back to school, Aaron and I go back to work, and everything goes back to normal. At least that’s the plan.